As
Damian becomes a Teenager, the one person I keep having in my mind is ... my Pa.
I remember how Pa keep looking into the crib, but refused to carry such a small infant.
I remember when Damian reached his full-moon, and Pa awkwardly carried him and posed for a picture.
I remember how Pa said he gave up smoking because Damian was constantly coughing because of his allergy to ciggy smoke.
I remember Pa taking Damian and Marcus out to the playground so that my sister and I could have a little timeout.
I remember once when I wanted to cane Damian and Pa just whisked him away! Then I threatened Pa that if he doesn't allow me to cane that brat I will cane him [my son, not my Father :-D] harder!! But Pa just drove off to the shops and bought his grandson an ice-cream!
I remember when we first went to USA, how Damian, so tired from jet-lag was crying for his grandfather "I want my kung-kung. I want go back to Malaysia".
I remember how Pa used to save hundred of ringgit in coins and gave it to the grandchildren to be counted and divided amongst themselves. Pa was a good grandfather not only to my Damian, but to all his 13 grandchildren.
Why the nostalgia? I guess... with kids growing up, I realised that I can't pause time, no matter how much I wanted to. I might have this desire to keep them small, to keep them with me forever.... but that's not possible.
They have to grow up. They have to leave the nest one day.
Damian turning 13 is just one more step into that direction. I cant stop that, and I do not intend to.
What I can do now is to continue to ground him, give him roots, and at the same time, strengthen his wings. He'll fly away one day. And I hope.... that he'll also learn to fly home once in a while.
Just like what Pa gave us......
.